On this journey called ... life

Are you serious?

2011-12-31T00:29:00.000-05:00

Have I really been gone that long?? August 2010 . . . . Well, I'm making my way back to the blogosphere, but in a slightly different capacity.

I'm starting a blog called Picture This . . . Life , which like my blog, On This Journey Called . . . Life, is my take of life except through pictures. Believe me, I haven't fooled myself into thinking I'm the next Nigel Barker (isn't he gorgeous!). I'm hoping to keep telling stories in the way words could never do and in the mean time, learn to take great pictures. So take a second and join me as I start this journey.

I hope 2012 is an awesome year for you all and I'll see you on the other side of the lens.

I love blogging . . . Right???

2010-08-23T00:05:00.001-04:00

I was speaking with my friend Audrey @ I'm So Aud about this last week. I was trying to express to her how I've been feeling about blogging. Real Talk. . . I was feeling confused and empty. Then this blog title popped into my head. I LOVE blogging. I really do. It is an awesome outlet for me, but for this past week, I've had to force myself to think of something worthwhile to post about. I came up with nothing. photo credit

I mean, I've lived a full life, right? Didn't I have a great childhood, filled with crazy stories. Like that one time I thought I was being kidnapped. Or when I almost drowned. My first kiss. . . I mean I have great stories, right? Wouldn't someone want to read them? Wouldn't I want to share them? So what's my problem? I don't know.

My blogging is the polar opposite of how I live my life. On here, I give it to you straight, no chaser. No smoke. No mirrors. "In real life," I keep my cards close to my chest. If you don't know, then you'll probably never know and don't need to know. That's me. But here, somehow, I bare it all. Maybe that dissonance has finally come to a head.

Are your words ever trapped in your head? How do you get them out? Do you ever wonder if you should keep on blogging?

Remember to check out Tell Me Something Good Blog for amazing daily conversation!

How often do you do it . . .

2010-08-18T01:03:00.000-04:00

Every time he takes you to your favorite restaurant for dinner? When he brings home that necklace you've been eyeballing for weeks? Whenever he mows the lawn or serves you breakfast in bed? Or is it the simple things that bring it out of you. When he holds the door for you to walk through or when he helps you to put on your coat? What does it take, for you do it? How often do you say Thank You? What? You thought I was talking about something . . . Oooh, you nasty . . .
photo credit

It's easy to remember to say it when you receive the big things, but do you remember to say Thank You for the simple things?

Right now, I'm gonna take this opportunity to send a big THANK YOU to CK and Becka at Made By Bedtime Tales for awarding me the Versatile Blogger Award (#3) and to Ms. Baby Plan at The Baby Plan for awarding me the One Lovely Blog Award. Both awards ask you to list 7 things about yourself so I'm cheating and combining.

I had the highest road test score of anyone I knew (98% lost two points for driving too slowly) until I met an ex who told me he scored 100%. To this day I think he was lying.
I'm usually a happy blogger, but the one thing that ruffles me is when people don't even read my post, but use the comment section to post their 30 blog links and twitter aliases.
By the time I was two years old, I had already lived in three different countries although neither of my parents were in the military.
When I was 16, my father bought me a Gucci watch. When I was 21, it was stolen. I would love to buy myself another one, but I can't rationalize spending that much money on a watch when I don't wear them.
My husband married me for my looks, not my cooking, LOL.
My laptop is pink. My camera is pink. I have a pink coin purse and a pink wristlet. But I hate the color pink. (I buy pink things because it reminds me of breast cancer awareness)
When I laugh uncontrollably, I snort. Not repeatedly like a pig , but every now and again one slips out.

*Here's a bonus. I dislike long posts (especially long posts written by me), so I'm going to inform the award recipients of their awards directly.

Remember to stop by Tell Me Something Good blog for daily conversation.

It's so hard to say . . .

2010-08-10T11:53:00.002-04:00

Three simple words, but they might be the hardest words to say. They make your palms sweat and your heart beat a little faster. You consider, reconsider and consider again before you let them escape your lips. Should I say it? Maybe he should say it first? Why do I have to be the one to say it? You give in and you say those three words . . .

I am sorry.

And it's like a cool breeze on a hot summer day. The tension, still there, but just a little lighter. Still upset or hurt, but not as angry. Why are those words so filled with relief, yet so hard to say? One word. Power.

When you were young and played capture the flag, cops and robbers or, like our precocious group, find and grind (a story for another day), the captor had the power. The captured person had none. They were at the mercy of the captor. Likewise, "I am sorry" causes one to flinch because power has been shifted to the recipient. Now they can decide to accept or reject. Who would want to give up power? But there is power in just saying those words.

In 2005, an article was posted about a couple, who at that time, had the world's longest marriage. At the time of the article, Percy and Florence Arrowsmith were about to celebrate 80 years of marriage. When asked what was the secret to their success, Florence said, "If you've had a quarrel, you make it up - never be afraid to say sorry."

Florence hit it on the head. Don't let your fear of saying "I am sorry" prevent you from moving into a better place in your relationship. For me, that's a hard pill to swallow, but I plan to make it until death does us part.

Don't forget to check out Tell Me Something Good for daily conversation. We've got something new everyday.

Yin . . . Yang . . .

2010-08-05T01:56:00.000-04:00

I liked the "bad boy." He was the opposite of me. I was Yin. He was Yang. And we were headed straight for destruction.

I should have known that something was not quite right when he "found" me one day at work. Stalked might be a more accurate term. He searched four floors of an office building until he found me. He said someone told him where I sat. I told him he was a liar. He admitted my suspicions were right. Caution bells rang in my head. I turned off the volume.

So time passed. We dated. I was not attracted to him physically. He was average height and skinny. Not my style. But he was gritty. Urban. Different . . . Wrong. And I liked that. And he liked that I was the good girl. He was guns, drugs and alcohol. I went to church every week. A match made in hell. I felt the fire. I turned off my senses.

The relationship went the course that all bad relationships go. He was jealous. He was abusive. And I stayed. He didn't want me around my friends or family. Yet I stayed . . . until I couldn't take it anymore. The only way out was for him to leave me. So I made him miserable. Risky, but it worked. He left. I sold my house and moved. Sometimes you have to leave it all behind.

Often times I think, oh, if I could do it over again. If I had simply heeded to the warning signs. How different, how happy, that time in my life would have been. Then I remember, the slightest change in my life could have set me on a course that led me away from my husband. So I say to myself, it was all worth it because in I truly am the Yin to his Yang.

This post was written for Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop.
Prompt #1 was "If you could do it over again . . . "

Don't forget to stop in at Tell Me Something Good Blog and join in the conversation!!

I feel something in there . . .

2010-08-02T06:17:00.000-04:00

You know that feeling . . . in your gut. No, not that feeling you get after you ate something that you found in the back of the fridge, couldn't remember when you put it there and knew it smelled funny when your raised it to your mouth . . . or after eating bad food at a wedding (my poor husband had quite a day yesterday). Nope, I'm not talking about that feeling that causes you to pop two effervescent pills into a glass or water, pinch your nose and take it down the gullet (lol). However, I believe that's affectionately known as the bubble guts. I'm talking about a different kinda feeling in your gut. The type that makes you wanna jump on Oprah's couch and shout to the high heavens (thank you Tom Cruise).

I'm being featured!! (click to link) I have to thank Teri @ The Bipolar Diva for recommending me to Dee @ Say Anything. Please, check out the feature and come back and tell me what you think.

And if that wasn't enough going on, Christina @ Being Mrs. Jones and I are finally ready to share what we've been working on. Stop in at Tell Me Something Good. This blog was dreamed up after a blogger comment snafu. Christina and I spent the day emailing back and forth and Tell Me Something Good was born. We can't wait to hear from you.

The word of the week is Effervescent, of which one meaning is: (Chemistry) (of a liquid) giving off bubbles of gas; bubbling. Join in the Word Up, Yo, a word meme by Natalie, Kristen and Liz. Click on the Word Up, Yo button to link in.

Oh, I think they like me . . .

2010-07-28T01:48:00.001-04:00

I sometimes find myself completely unable to put my thoughts into words. I love words. I love the emotions words draw from the reader and the writer. I love the pictures that they create in my mind's eye. This blog award really helped me believe my words were really painting a clear picture of my thoughts to my readers.

Susie Q at I Married a Moron - And Survived! gave me the A Blog With Substance award at the beginning of the month, but I could not think of a five word philosophy for my life. After visiting Robyn's Nest today, her post helped me to develop the matra that I needed to accept this award. I want to do more to enjoy the right now in my life. I'm such a planner, I'm always getting ready for the next several months, but I also want to focus on this:

Enjoy the Beauty of Now

Thank you Susie for this Award. I'm passing it on to the following bloggers:

Robyn's Nest

I'm So Aud

Peaceful Divas

Florida Girl Meets Midwest

Green Monkey Tales

I was given the Versatile Blogger award by CK and Becka at Made by Bedtime Tales. Made by Bedtime Tales is a whimsical blog filed with great stories and awesome projects. To accept this award, I have to tell you 7 things about myself you don't know.

I sucked my thumb until I was 12 years old. The end of thumb sucking coincided with when I started kissing boys. I'm not saying there is a correlation, but maybe my parent's shouldn't have tried so hard to make me stop :)
I used to be able to wrap both my legs around my neck, but now I'm old, so I can only do one leg at a time.
I want braces on my teeth because I think braces are cute.
I love horseback riding even though horses scare me a bit.
In high school, a friend and I skipped class, but we couldn't think of anything to do. So we went to another class and ended up getting excused for missing class because we participated in the other class.
My handwriting is horrible. Sometimes, I can't read it.
I love water balloon fights. When I was in college, we had a HUGE water balloon fight. At the end of the fight, I was completed soaked from head to toe, including my sneakers that made squish sounds as I walked . . . . into class . . . looking (and sounding) a Hot Mess.

I'm passing this award to:
Marlie and Me
The Happy and Not-So Happy Rantings of a Chocolate Mom
New Jersey Memories
A Sensitive Poet (This young man is so very talented, check out his poetry)

The WOW of the week is "Hot Mess." Definition #2 is a person who looks as if they've been to hell and back. Join in on this really fun word meme run by Natalie, Kristin and Liz. Click on the button for this week's link.

I was So High . . .

2010-07-22T12:15:00.000-04:00

The lights were low. I felt his body pressed against mine. I could smell his cologne. I stared into his eyes and he smiled the biggest smile. My palms were sweaty, but he didn't care. He grasped my right hand his in left and his right arm was wrapped tightly around my waist. The room was spinning. . . or maybe we were spinning, but it was all in a slow motion. I was so high . . . he was so high . . . and John Legend sang us away from the rest of the world. This was my wedding day.

I loved that song, So High, since the first day I heard it. For my 28th birthday, my husband put together a slide show of our relationship and that song was the soundtrack. There is something about song that reminds me of our love. So when we had to decide on a song for our first dance, there was no question of what OUR song would be. There no need to consider a rambunctious booty shaking, arm waving, feet stomping tune or some other ballad. Nothing else would do.

So as we danced. I didn't see my friends and family sitting at the tables looking at us or standing taking pictures. I didn't see the videographer or photographers. I didn't see my daddy beaming or his mom crying (saw that later in the video). I saw him. I saw him smiling. And I was So High.

This was submitted as part of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop. I used prompt # 2, Write about your wedding song. What was it and why did you choose it?

This post also contains the Word of the Week. Word Up, Yo is a word meme put together by Natalie, Kristen and Liz. This week's Word of the Week is Rambunctious - turbulently active and noisy.

Baby, since the day you came into my life, you made me realize that we were born to fly

~ John Legend, So High

Nobody puts Baby in a corner . . .

2010-07-17T12:48:00.002-04:00

You know that line from Dirty Dancing where Johnny/Patrick rescues Baby/Jennifer from the corner her father made her sit in (if I'm totally showing my age and everyone here is to young for this movie, here is the clip ).

I wish I had my very own Johnny when I was in Kindergarten because that's what they did to me. They thought I was a baby, so they literally put me in a corner . . . away from the other students. Why?? Because I had already completed Kindergarten, but I was only 5 years old. They didn't want to put me in 1st grade. Ummm. . . hello school board, you do the math. If I started Kindergarten at 4, I wasn't gonna be 6 in time for 1st grade. They eventually promoted me to 1st grade in January (I was still only 5 years old) after four months of sitting in a corner.

Their actions made just about as much sense as this street sign that is prominently posted at the corner of 6th and F Streets, NW - right by the Verizon Center where the Washington Wizards play basketball (click to enlarge if you can't see what the to one says).

Soooo . . . can I park or not? I actually called this sign in and the lady at the call center said, "It says what?? That doesn't make sense." . . . . . Exactly.

Something else that doesn't make sense is my need for things to be in order. I'm that person you see in the grocery store turn a can right side up and keep on walking. This is how I store my food in my cabinet.

Why do we have 8 cans of blackeye peas? It's my husband's doing. I think he's saving for the apocalypse. In contrast to the organization I have in about every other aspect of my life, below is pic of my work bag. I can barely find my keys in that thing (daily issue) and I'm almost sure if I looked, I could find a receipt from 2008 when I bought the thing.

It doesn't look so bad in the pic, but believe me, it's bad. LOL. Everything sinks to the bottom and I think the bag eats it. Oh, here's a bonus. The roll of Smarties candy that I have in there that takes all of 10 seconds to devour, takes about 20 minutes of jogging to burn off the 100 calories I took in. Doesn't. Make. Sense.

Lastly, something that most folks wouldn't guess about me is that I'm pretty mean >>>Insert Shocked Face Here<<< I know!!! Truth be told, I'm pretty nice most of the time. I try to look out for my fellow homo sapiens, but there is a point in time when if you try to speak to me . . . you will be met with some really choice words. Bottom line. Do not wake the sleeping monster.

Case in point, I was in my dorm room napping on a Saturday afternoon. My friend called my room and woke me up. Here's how the conversation went.

Ring . . . Ring . . . Ring . . . Ring
Me - groggy and sleepy - Hello??
Friend - Oh, hi. I didn't think you'd be in there.
Me - iritated - So why did you call me?

The conversation ended pretty quickly after that. I'm generally not that snarky. My response didn't even make much sense since people call people they don't think to be home all the time to leave messages (which is what she explained), but like I said, I'm a different person when someone wakes me up.

I can't be the only one who has encountered things that just don't make sense (please please say I'm not the only one cause that means the problem lies with me, LOL). Whether within you or around you, what have you seen that just leaves you saying "huh??"

I was able to get two stories into one post (LOL). I hope it makes up for the fact that it's been a week since I posted. Work has been a killer. Although it's too late to enter the post, I still used the Word of the (past) Week in this post. The new WOW will be up tomorrow, check it out at either Natalie's, Kristin's, or Liz's blogs.

* Special announcement - In my penpal post, I said my blog was my private life that no one knows about, well, my best friend has entered blog land!!! I confessed to her that I'm been living the blog lifestyle for a while now, LOL. Check her out, she's just getting started. Image of Paradise

I got punched in the face . . .

2010-07-10T01:19:00.002-04:00

Okay, so clearly that's not me, but work with me on this. photo credit

Back in my senior year of college, there was a major snowfall. My friends and I decided to revert to childhood and have an old fashion snowball fight (hey, I was only 19 years old). So we were out there having a good old time. A guy friend and I started wrestling in the snow. It just so happened that his girlfriend saw us playing and apparently didn't appreciate the physical nature of our play. So . . . . she decided to put me in a head lock. Ummmm . . . wrong move. We slipped. Her left eye met my right knee. She spent the next several days wearing dark sun glasses. In retrospect, I wish I would have just punched her in the face. LOL.

Earlier this week, blogger decided to punch me in the face. I sat there and typed my post about my first date with my husband. I proofread and pushed the publish button with pride. I received emails stating that I received comments, but each time I viewed my blog, there was NOTHING. gasp. . . I whined to my husband, "Babe, my blog is brooookkkeeeennnnnn!!" His response, "Awww . . . " I wish I would have punched him in the face. Instead I just scowled at his nonchalant response do my SERIOUS dilemma. I posted a question to Google Help and Bonnie tried to help me to no avail.

So I decided to try something different. I emailed everyone in response to their comments. I had great conversations with so many of you that day. In particular, Christina and I chatted back and forth for hours. From there, we've decided to collaborate on something pretty special that's forthcoming. Stay tuned for more about that. I wish I would have started responding to you guys that way before because it was great having those conversations. Hopefully Google won't feel the need to punch me in the face again, but I definitely appreciate the lesson learned. How do you keep up with followers/visitors who comment on your blog. Do you respond via email? Do you comment back on their blogs?

This blog post followed the #2 prompt from Mama Kat's Writing Workshop - I wish I would have…Describe a time when you didn’t take action, but later wished you would have. Join in on the fun. Click on photo for link.

How it all began . . . .

2010-07-05T22:17:00.003-04:00

*UPDATE: Thanks to everyone who has left comments. I received them in my inbox. There still seems to be a bug in the comment display, but I'm glad that the comments are finally displaying.

Happy Belated Independence Day ladies. We had a quiet weekend. We pretty much stayed indoors for most of the weekend, but today we got out for ~~dinner~~ lunch and a movie. We saw Grown Ups with Adam Sandler, Chris Rock, David Spade, Kevin James and Rob Schneider. The movie was HILARIOUS and sweet. As we were leaving the theatre, we drove by a place that is really sentimental to us.

It's where it all began . . . .

I met my husband in August of 2006. We had our first date at Smokey Bones Restaurant. I was usually cool and confident when I went out with guys, but there was something different about this guy. . . . Maybe it was because he didn't seem disarmed by me like guys usual were. Or . . . maybe it was because he was 6'4" and super handsome.

In any case, as I sat across from him at the table, I couldn't look him in the eye, blushed throughout the entire meal and fumbled over my words. I had no idea what was wrong with me. Dinner went well, so we walked over to the movie theatre and watched the oh so romantic, Talladega Nights . . . . .

Several months went by and our romance progressed. He ~~wined~~ juiced and dined me. We traveled together. Went bowling. Watched the Superbowl. I mean it was great. The guy was smooth. He even bought me a puppy.

I was smitten.

But it wasn't up to just me. I came with baggage. I came with a pet snake that he had to accept. LOL, that didn't come easy. I also came with a fixed in her way, grumpy, will bite you if you piss her off Siamese cat.

Like I said, the dude was smooth. He even won her over.

I think it even shocked her.

So today, for the first time since August of 2006, we went back to the theatre where we saw our first movie together. It was cool to be back there. It was nice to reflect on the long way we've come.

And the story continues . . . .

I participated in two memes in this post.

iHappy Mondays is a meme created by Mummy-time. I was introduced to this meme by Tiny Little Reveries, who has a great blog that I follow. iHappy Mondays is a meme where you post pics that make you happy that you took with your iPhone (or from your regular camera phone if that's what you got, LOL).

Secondly, of course, I participated in the Nerd Mafia's Word Up Yo meme. In this meme, you use the Word of the Week (WOW) in your post. This week's word is fumble. I used the definition - to make, handle, etc., clumsily or inefficiently.

Even when I'm sad . . .

2010-07-02T20:48:00.001-04:00

Could it be that I'm not starting with a childhood story?? Maybe I'll think of one by the time I get to the end. I've noticed a lot of the ladies in my blog circle participate in a Writer's Workshop by Mama Kat, so I thought I'd try my hand at this workshop.

The focus that I selected was: 10 things sure to put a smile on my face when I'm sad.

1. Babies - I'm not one of those who thinks every baby is ooooh soooo "cute", but I think every baby is adorable. Their baby smile. Their baby smell. Their baby antics. Babies are perfect.

2. Shopping!!!! - I love shopping. The outlet mall is my Mecca and I'm sure to get a smile out of every trip.

3. Reminiscing - When my friends and I get together, every conversation starts with "remember when . . . " Looking at old photos also puts a smile on my face.

4. Birthdays - Although I'm not thrilled with the candles on my cakes increasing, I love birthdays. My friend Audrey @ I'm so Aud is celebrating her birthday today (and her official blog launch). If you can, stop by and wish her birthday greetings on her special day.

5. Reading - A really good book can drag me out of my funk and into the life of the story.

6. Eating - I love food. Pasta. Cookies. Pizza. Cake. YUM!!!

7. Swimming - I'm an island girl. I love going to beach. Sand between my toes. Sun on my back. Wading through the beautiful blue refreshing water.

8. DANCING!!! - I can work these hips like a stripper, LOL. I will dance the night away. Great workout. Great stress reliever. Talk about a two for one. Bonus is when my husband joins in with his awkward dance moves. Definitely leaves me in giggles.

9. Singing - I can sing myself into tears or flip it into singing myself into happiness (which is usually accompanied by fits of dancing).

10. Traveling - I love to travel. I wish I could do more of it. Cruising is my most favorite travel method. After cruising it's hard for me to come back to reality.

* I know the usual answer of "my husband" is absent. He has a amazing knack of being both the biggest joy and biggest annoyance in my life. LOL. So he just gets an honorable mention . . . LOL.

I ran away from home . . .

2010-06-29T10:44:00.001-04:00

I can't remember how old I was and I can't remember what "pushed me over the edge," but I do remember trying to run away from home once.

Yes, TRYING to run away. I packed my little bag, mustered all my anger, girded my loins (LOL, always wanted to use that in conversation) and walked my little too grown behind out the door. I walked ALLLLLL the way to our retaining wall and sat for probably 10 minutes, but it seemed like 10 hours.

Yeah, they'll be sorry when they see I'm gone. . . tick tock tick tock . . . yup, they'll be crying and sad and come looking for me . . . . tick tock tick tock . . . I finally gave up and went back into the house. I don't think they even noticed I was gone. Or maybe they saw me sitting on the wall the entire time and were laughing at me from their bedroom window.

Fast forward, to present, three of my girlfriends and I "ran away from home" this past weekend and had a girlfriend road trip. Before I give you the snapshot of our weekend, allow me accept this award from Tica @ Tica Tattleteller. To accept this award, I have to say where I see myself in 10 years and then pass in on. Okay, in 10 years, I'll be forty . . . wow . . . and I see myself celebrating 10 years of marriage, raising two children and traveling more (hopefully visiting one of the places in the blog award pic). I'm passing this award to Momarchy, The 5th Girl and The Baby Plan. Thank you Tica for the great award. It's amazing how it fits with my post, LOL.

So, my girlfriends and I hit the road, fleeing the DC area, and drove the Atlanta, GA. I mentioned before that I'm Seventh-Day Adventist. All of our churches are connected under one General Conference. From last Wednesday to next Sunday, all of our churches around the globe have ~~descended upon Atlanta like the plagues of Egypt~~ come to Atlanta to fellowship and conduct meetings/elections. We saw old friends, I met up with a classmate I haven't seen in 12 years and, of course, did some retail therapy (GA sales tax is a murderous 8%, but it's better than DC's 10%). We even drove through the set of a zombie movie, which initially FREAKED US OUT because there was a car on it's side and it looked like it was an accident. (When the movie The Walking Dead comes out, if you see a silver Dodge Charger with four chics looking completely bugged out, that's us, LOL).

During the drive back, we all said we wanted to stay in Atlanta, but jobs, husbands and a plethora of bills beckoned us to returned. We're already in talks for our next run for the border. The Word of the Week (WOW is plethora, which means overabundance, excess). Come play along in this word meme by the Nerd Mafia. (click on pic for link)

What happened to the 9 year old?

2010-06-21T02:04:00.000-04:00

Last week I shared with you that at the age of 9 my then boyfriend taught me a lesson about dating that stuck with me for the rest of my life. I learned that in relationships, especially the immature, self-serving relationships that you have as pre-teens, in teen years and quite often into adulthood, people are in it for what they can get out of it. I also shared that after I got a new boyfriend at the age of 12, I was never single again. So here is how that happened.

Like I said, the lesson stuck with me. I vowed I would never let myself be on the side where anyone else got more out of the relationship than I did. I know it's the absolute WORST attitude to have about a relationship. Every time I felt I was on the losing end or less beneficial side of a relationship, I moved on to guy who was waiting in the wings. That was my MO, my defense mechanism, my foible.

But I eventually lost myself in that cycle and the cycle started to define me. I was not the sassy 9 year old who told her boyfriend he could step off. I wasn't even the teen girl, who moved from the 13 year old gentleman to the 17 year old older guy to the 15 year old funny guy as I saw fit. I became the 22 year old who started defining herself by being in a relationship. I became the 24 year old who stayed too long in a bad relationship. I became the 25 year old who accepted mediocrity in a "relationship" because at least it was a "relationship". My independent spirit became needy. My sassy 'tude became deflated. My foible became my downfall. I finally woke up and realized I didn't like who was looking back at me in the mirror. And although I did move from the "relationship" to my husband, I was no longer THAT girl. My husband has no idea why I need to be so strong, so independent and so unlike the girl I became, but I'm happy about who I am today.

What were some of your dating missteps and regrets?

This post was written as a continuation of my last post and I'm surprised I opened up this much on here. It's also my submission in this week's Word of the Week, a blog hop led by Nerd Mafia (Natalie, Liz and Kristin). This week the word is foible; one definition is a minor flaw or shortcoming in character or behavior. Come join us (click on pic for link).

Oh for the love of gadgets

2010-06-16T22:00:00.001-04:00

My husband and I spent the better half of yesterday online at Apple's website trying to buy the phone of the ~~century~~ ~~decade~~ ~~year~~ moment, the iPhone 4. No such luck. We're Mr. and Mrs. Gadget over here and Apple has seen a pretty penny of our money with our Ipad 3G, two iPhones and an iPod Touch. (The gadgets don't stop there, I have a touch screen slow cooker, LOL) I've decided to wait until I can get the iPhone in the store to purchase mine. He's going to pre-order and have his delivered.

On to the purpose for my post. For the past several months, I've been wanting to purchase a big girl camera. I've asked around the blog world and gotten suggestions from some very helpful ladies (thanks Megan @ Twinsomnia and Katie @ Katie's Dailies)

Canon PowerShot Elph SD1100 IS
photo credit

Canon EOS Rebel XS

Megan @ Twinsomnia uses this camera and if you check out her blog, you will see how gorgeous her pics are - although it might be the skill of the photographer, not just the camera.

Features include: 10.1 megapixels, EOS integrated cleaning system, 2.5" LCD screen, external flash mount, SD/SDHC memory card compatible, 3 frames per second shooting and a host of other features. This one retails at the big box store for $499 and comes with the the camera, lens, camera strap, software, two cables, the battery and charger. photo credit

Nikon D70
Katie @ Katie's Dailies uses this camera and if you check out her blog, you'll see her amazing photos there as well.

Features include: 6.1 mega pixels, 1.8" LCD screen, external flash mount, 25 custom settings and a number of other features. This camera was introduced in 2004, yet it still sells from between $1500 - $2000 new. In the box: camera, lens, strap, software, cables, lens cap, battery and charger. photo credit

Canon Rebel T1i
While checking out the previously listed cameras, I found this little beaut.

Features includes: 15.1 megapixels, HD video capture, 3" LCD screen, 3x optical zoom, face detection, 3.4 frames per second shooting, EOS integrated cleaning system and a number of other features. I found one online from a pretty popular site for $734 that in addition to everything in the box (camera, lens, strap, eye cup, cables and software), it included some additional software -an 1.5 hour video course on using the camera, an extra battery and a shoulder carry bag. photo credit

I will be honest. When I saw these prices and knew I had the money to pay for a camera at this price, I couldn't help but think, why not get this gorgeous little shoulder carry bag for about the same price instead (LV Montorgueil PM MSRP $800). photo credit

I'm still on the hunt. Anyone else looking for the perfect camera? Any other suggestions out there for cameras? Anyone think I should just get the purse instead?? LOL (my little pink camera would fit in this just fine). I wonder if I just say the word "gullet" if I could post this on the WOW blog hop. They'd probably shove a a camera down my gullet if I did (LOL).

He broke my heart when I was 9

2010-06-14T00:28:00.000-04:00

Well, I guess not really, but I was pretty bummed about it. Why did I have a boyfriend at 9 years old? It was that childhood kinda relationship. The one when he asks someone else to ask you if you would be his girlfriend and you figure why not since you have no major commitments for the next few years other than sixth grade graduation. So that's how I got my first boyfriend at 9. Hey, what can you expect from a girl who started wearing heels at 11 years old. So how did he break my heart? The conversation went kinda like this:

10 year old boyfriend - Umm, you should kiss me (he was so smooth, LOL)
Me - No way dude
Boyfriend - Other people get to kiss their girlfriend
Me - So. You ain't putting your lips on me
Boyfriend - Well, she said if I made her my girlfriend, she'd kiss me *points to girl standing 10 feet away*
Me - Whatever, guess you got a new girlfriend then *boyfriend walks off into the sunset with his new girlfriend who was willing to give up the goods . . . . wench* LOL

So I learned a harsh reality that 9 year old shouldn't have to learn. He will leave you for the girl who gives him what he wants. I considered wrapping my little 9 year old hands around his gullet, but didn't. Instead I licked my wounds for the next couple years, enjoyed telling guys that I didn't want a boyfriend. I started dating again at the ripe old age of 12 (you know, cause I was so mature now). I was never single again. How is someone never single again from the age of 12 on? I'll tell you more in a little bit.

How old were you when you started dating? When was your first heart break and how did you deal?

It typed this entire post then save it proofread. I visited Natalie @ Mommy of a Monster and learned about the new word game that she and her blog friends came up with. Check it out. It's loads of fun. This week's word is gullet - one definition is throat (technically I used it in my post as neck, LOL)

Shoes and Shakes

2010-06-11T00:16:00.000-04:00

As I stated in my last post, I love high heels and I have been wearing them for the past 19 years (oh boy, I'm really telling my age, here, yeesh). I thought I'd share some of my favorites with you, so you can see a little bit more about my shoe ~~obsession, fetish, compulsion, preoccupation~~ love. Shoes are my fashion go to item. They make or break an outfit. They take it from causal to chic to glamorous. So here are a few of my little lovelies. photo credit

These are from Bakers and I've had these shoes for YEARS. They are 4". They are my only metallic shoe. I would love to get another (higher) pair of silver shoes.

I *heart* these shoes. I love that they aren't the regular looking shoe that everyone has. The bow says cutesy, but the overall look is edgy.

These are 4 1/2" heels from Nine West. Love these shoes (although I've never worn them out the house. I like walking around in them in the house cause they're cute. Still looking for the perfect outfit.

These are my tried and true 4 3/4" peep-toe leopard prints. I wore these for our engagement photo shoot while we walked about Georgetown taking pictures. Didn't hurt my feet at all, which is a very important part of picking shoes for me.

These are my favorite pair of wedges. They are 4". I wear them literally everywhere with anything. I wear them to work. I wear them to the movies. Dresses, pants or skinny jeans, it works across all outfits. I find it hard to find a nice pair of heels at Coach (I have lots of sneakers, ballet slippers and sandals, but only one pair of heels). Coach tends to have chunky heels on their shoes and that's not my style, but they did it right with these wedges.

So, now on to the shakes. Crystal @ Wanna Be Balance Mom posted a couples weeks ago about a product line called Isagenix. I posted a comment about checking them out and Crystal, being the awesome chic she is, sent me a sample of the IsaLean Chocolate Shake. I tried it out yesterday as I was running out of the house.

I didn't mix it particularly well (which was evident as I drank and found some powder lumps). In the flavor department it was a weak seven (6.8 - 7.3). But I have to say in the fulfillment department, this thing is a TEN!!!! I drank it at 8:30 am just before jumping on the train. Usually if I grab something to eat (say croissant sandwich), my stomach starts talking an hour later. 10 o'clock rolled around . . . no hunger sounds. I wasn't even thinking about food. At about 10:30 am my training group took a break - snacks were provided - and I grabbed a mini danish. I took it back to the conference room and it sat on my plate until 11:30 am. I wasn't even hungry when I ate it, I just knew we were about to break for lunch in a half hour. When I got eat lunch at 12:30, I wasn't famished like I usually am.

I have to admit, I was skeptical. So I googled to see if it had an appetite suppressant in it. How can I be full FOR HOURS off essentially a milkshake? I haven't seen anything that says there is an appetite suppressant in it. So I'm happy to say I'm gonna get this product. I really need something to stand in for breakfast because I'd frankly rather sleep for the extra 20 mins (which leads to eating donuts/muffins/croissants when I get to work). I'm so grateful to Crystal for sharing her diet gem with the blog world.

So, what are you dieting secrets? I'm still on the road to getting my Mii to stop being chubby. And what is your fashion go to item?

I lost my virginity . . .

2010-06-06T00:50:00.000-04:00

It was a bright sunny day in the August . . . . oh wait . . . wrong post.

(photo credit This is a picture of Carambola Beach in St. Croix, USVI - my hometown. Yes, our water is that blue. Definitely worth the trip. Make it when you can. *end of shameless plug for hometown to increase tourism*)

This post is about me getting my FIRST BLOG AWARD!!!! My wonderful blog buddy, Natalie @ Mommy of a Monster, gave me this award. As such, I've now lost my blog award virginity.

So to follow the rules, I must:

1. Thank the person who honored me with this award.

Thank you so much Natalie. This girl is amazing. She has three little ones, a little guy just under 3 years old and twin infant daughters. They are so adorable!!! Her blog posts are hilarious and she's definitely a blogger to follow.

2. Share seven things about myself.

I only get pedicures. No manicures. Every time I go in for my pedicure, they ask if I'd like to wax my eyebrows or get a manicure. Nope, no thanks. I'm afraid to have to draw my eyebrows back on and, besides, I bite my nails.
I play Wii Tennis like I think I'm at the US Open. I don't get into a tennis outfit or anything, but I get tennis arm by the next day. I go hard.
I have retail fetishes, particularly Coach and Tiffany & Co. I shop there all the time even though I know I'm over paying. I'm pretty happy with my collection.
I'm afraid that my husband and I will never get to the point where we think we can afford to have a child. Being a Stay At Home Mom is already out of the question.
I've been wearing high heeled shoes since I was 11 years old. I used to practice wearing my mom's heels in the house and then she let me wearing high heels for my sixth grade graduation. Been smitten ever since.
I met my best friend, Ms. DD, in 1985, thus making this year our 25th anniversary of our friendship.
I don't like apples or apple pie. I love apple sauce and apple juice. Go figure.

3. Pass the award on to ~~fifteen~~ four bloggers who I've recently discovered who I think are fantastic.

Shannon @ Green Monkey Tales - Shannon is an amazing writer. She has a post about summer love that will having you hanging on to every word. She is so real with what she posts.
Jennifer @ Baby Making Machine - Jennifer is a future mom, only about three weeks to go. Her blog is great. I especially love her letters to her daughter, Lil' J.
Megan @ Twinsomnia - Megan is a mom blogger who always has a great post about her ever exciting life. She has a hilarious post about her daughter's dance techniques. Plus she loves purple. That makes her great in my book.
Lori @ Tiny Little Reveries - Lori is a fun blogger to follow. Her Tuesday post-its make me laugh every time.

There are other blogs that I love, Teri @ The Bipolar Diva for one, but she recently got this award. Check out these blogs. If you aren't already following them, I'm sure you will be after checking them out. Thanks again Natalie.

I used to have a pen pal . . .

2010-06-03T00:01:00.000-04:00

Last week I spoke with Natalie @ Mommy of a Monster and Teri @ The Bipolar Diva via email about SITS and how it's great that we met up through that site. It got me thinking about how technology has changed the way we communicate. photo credit

I've mentioned before that I'm a Seventh-day Adventist (SDA) Christian. Growing up, we had a magazine called Guide, which basically is the equivalent to unisex, mini version of Seventeen Magazine for SDA kids. The magazine had all sorts of articles, games, jokes, etc. But near the very end of the magazine was a section for pen pals. (come to think of it, it was almost like personal ads for kids . . . whoa) I remember reading through the names and descriptions and thinking "Hmmm . . . . she sounds interesting, maybe I'll write to her."

So I wrote my letter and sent it on it's way. . . . and waited. Things didn't move as fast back in 1994 as they do now. Finally one day, my father brought home a letter just from MY PEN PAL. I ripped it open in anticipation and read through it. We exchanged letters and got to know each other. It was amazing to know with all our differences (I was black, she was white; I was in the Caribbean, she was in the states; I went to private school; she went to public school), we had sooo many things in common (we both LOVED Kris Kross; had crushes on guys who had no idea; could relate to everything each other wrote in the letters). Eventually, we stopped writing to each other, but I still have her picture in one of my photo albums.

One thing I never did was tell my friends I had a pen pal. I could just imagine hearing, "What?!? You are talking to a COMPLETE STRANGER!!" Then one day, a wise man named Al Gore invented THE INTERNET (tee hee). Now talking to complete strangers is the norm. With Myspace, Twitter, ~~Crackbook~~, Facebook, blogs and a multitude of other internet-based social mediums as close as your smart phone away, you're strange if you don't talk to complete strangers. However, just like my pen pal, I keep my blog life to myself. Only my husband and my friend Audrey know I blog. My blog, like my pen pal, is my dirty little secret . . .

Do your friends and family know you blog? What do they think about you baring it all on the net?

Peace of mind . . . .

2010-05-31T02:01:00.000-04:00

Tonight my husband and I sat on our front steps for about 25 minutes. Just prior to that, we were in the house, in front the big screen watching something that I can't recall and on one of our gadgets (ipad, laptop, cell phone, something). It seems that we are always Googling, YouTubing, Wikipedia searching, channel surfing or otherwise occupied. So tonight, I asked to sit outside for a bit and we left everything else inside. photo credit

It was soooo peaceful. There was sound was the sound of the crickets and the occasional passing vehicle, the smell of my blooming hydrangeas and lilies and the warmth of my husband's arm around my shoulders. We made some small talk and smooched, but pretty much just sat in silence and basked in the peace of the night. It was simply beautiful.

What do you do to find your peace of mind?

Three wishes . . . . . .

2010-05-26T22:14:00.004-04:00

When I was younger, I used to wish and wish and wish for hair as long as my Barbie's hair. Oh, if I had hair as long as Barbie's I could have long billowing curls or a really long pony tail or a number of other styles that I just KNEW I would look so gorgeous wearing. Oh how I wish.

Then my older brother said to me one day, "If your hair was as long as your Barbie doll's hair, your hair would be like three inches long."

When the room stopping spinning around me following that revelation from ~~the dream killing jerk~~ my brother, I realized I should just leave the whole Barbie hair wish alone.
photo credit

As of late, I've been evaluating where I am in life right now and thinking of where I want to be. I love making lists and plan on writing down my five year plan in the coming weeks. I know the saying, anything worth having is worth waiting for and I plan on eventually acquiring these things over the next five years, but if I had three wishes . . .

I wish I could have a piano.

I used to play the piano when I was younger, right up until I left home for my Junior year of college. Playing the piano was such a relaxing, therapeutic escape for me. I would close my eyes and run my fingers across the keys. I was no Beethoven, but I was pretty good. So the question might be, why not just get a piano? Not so easy. I have no where in my townhouse to put it. So, that leads me to my second wish.

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I wish we had a brand new single family home.

First of all, it would be a great place to put my piano. Then they would be all the wonderful space that would come with it. I would have a real kitchen to cook in and a new space to decorate. It would be cool to have nifty stuff like double vanity sinks and a jacuzzi tub. It would give us great space to raise our future family (and our current menagerie - two dogs, cat and snake). So lastly . . .

photo credit

I wish my husband and I could sail off into the sunset.

I was telling a friend of mine today that for my 35th birthday, I would love to organize a group cruise with my friends and their husbands/significant others. My husband does not fly; absolutely refuses to get on an airplane, but he's completely open to the idea of a cruise. But I would love it if we could get away right now for at least a 7-day cruise.

photo credit

So those are my three wishes. What would your three wishes be?

I'm scared y'all

2010-05-22T00:56:00.001-04:00

I have a big decision to make and it's pretty unnerving.

I have a Master's Degree is Social Work and I currently work as a Probation Officer (juvenile). My clients (all male) are on the high end of the offenses scale so I supervise kids who commit felony charges (sex offenders, murderer, armed offenses, etc). I enjoy working with this population. I actually wanted to work as a probation officer since I was a teenager. So now that I'm here, and have been here for six years, I feel like I'm not effective.
photo credit

Why am I ineffective? Because by the time one of these kids come to me, they've probably been in crisis for years. They've not been going to school regularly for months. They had been smoking marijuana for quite some time. It has been instilled in them for years that very little is expected of them and from them. So then, then get arrested and a file with their name lands on my desk and all of a sudden, I'm supposed to "fix" them. Huh???

So this has been bothering me for a while. I love working with these kids, but I feel like it's just a revolving door until they graduate into the big leagues. So I want to work with them in school. In a school setting, I'd see them more than the 30 minutes (max) a week that I spend with my clients right now.

So, it looks like I'm headed back to school. I plan to pursue my PhD in Psychology. I want to be a School Psychologist. I scared. I'm afraid of failure. I know it's going to take time. It's going to be expensive. I plan to have a baby sometime in the mix. I don't know if I can get it all done. I know lot of people are full time students, full time parents and work full time, so it's definitely possibly. I hope I can do it do. photo credit

Playing in the Paint

2010-05-18T12:40:00.002-04:00

I've noticed many bloggers do a theme post on a weekly basis. Wordless Wednesday is a particularly popular one. I'm not a daily blogger as yet (I think my life might be too boring for that), but I'm going to dabble in a theme post. photo credit

I am not a makeup wearer. I frankly prefer to catch an extra 20 minutes in bed that to get dolled up for work. My makeup of choice for daily work wear . . . .

Oh yeah . . . . that's knock your socks off sexy isn't it. photo credit I want to spice up my weekend look so as luck would have it, my friend Audrey over at Single with a Desire has just become an Avon Sales Representative. I purchased a pretty decent starter kit.

Before: This is me everyday. I should have added the my "done up" look, which is eye liner and mascara for weekends, but the fact that I even got these pics taken was pure luck- I had a camera fiasco.

After: I used primarily Avon products. Purple Haze Quad, Bright Lights shadow stick in white and black Glimmer Stick liner. I used Smashbox bionic mascara-only one coat. As mentioned, I had a camera fiasco so after taking this shot, I blended out the outer edge that looks really harsh, but don't have a pic of that.

What I've learned in the first installment of Playing in the Paint.
1. Avon Quad powders have lots of shimmer, but aren't really bold.
2. I need an eyebrow brush and more shadow brushes.
3. I need to work on blending (clearly).
4. I don't have to be afraid of lining my inner eye in white.
5. Makeup in person is much more forgiving than a zoomed in picture with flash.

So please, please, please all you makeup mavens out there, help a girl out. Suggestions on color, application techniques and whatever else you can think of are greatly appreciated as I Play in the Paint.

Looking back

2010-05-10T08:21:00.000-04:00

Happy Mother's Day all you moms out there.

I started this blog a few days after Mother's Day 2009. I had no real plan or direction of what I would do with this blog. I was compelled to write something Mother's Day related since it was still pretty much the season of Mother's Day (sales). So I put my thoughts to "paper" and made this post. I just read it again for the first time in quite a while.

It still crushes me that she isn't here. She didn't see me graduate from undergrad/grad school. She didn't get to congratulate me on my first job . . . first car (that I bought) . . . first home. She never got to cry on my wedding day . . . meet my wonderful husband . . . or her future grandchildren. I cry because I miss her. I cry because I'm angry she couldn't be here. I cry because there was nothing I could do to make it so she could be here today. Leaves me feeling so powerless. What I always treasure are my last words to her . . . I love you. It's hard to remember to make your parting words, positive words. I'm so happy I can treasure my last words to her. No regrets. I miss you mom. I love you.

You wanna know what's gross??

2010-05-05T23:36:00.000-04:00

DANNON ACTIVIA

I don't know why I thought something that was supposed to affect my colon would taste yummy . . . Not so much. I opened it a raised I eye brow because it looked nothing like my yoplait yogurt that I'm accustomed to eating. After stirring for about 15 seconds, trying to make the consistency look normal, I took a taste . . . Can you say BLAH. I likened it to paste then thought, "Why do I know what paste tastes like??" . . . Oh yeah, 3rd grade, Elmers glue and a dare.

So as I continued to eat my cherry flavored paste, I decided to look up the ingredients and compare it to yoplait light. It has more calories, more sodium, more carbs and the same amount of sugar. Okay, so what's the benefit of eating this crap? Oh yeah, Bifidus Regularis, which according to the website, naturally occurs in your colon. That led me to wonder where'd they get the bifidus they put in my yogurt. I quickly moved on from that thought. So what's the purpose of this bifidus? The site states, " Activia every day for two weeks delivers enough Bifidus Regularis to help regulate your digestive system by helping with slow intestinal transit." Source So hold up. It's slowing down my system? Isn't that going to cause constipation? That can't be good.

Hmmm . . . I guess I was right . . . maybe it is paste.

My very random celebrity crush

2010-05-03T23:35:00.005-04:00

I have a new celebrity crush just about every other day. My husband teases me about it all the time and asks, "You still like XYZ?' So, today's celebrity crush is Christian Payton who played Paul Williams in the Temptations movie. *Sigh* I've always liked the bad boy and this pic is very badboy-esque.

For some reason the Stevie Wonder song, "For Once in My Life" popped into my head tonight so I put it into YouTube and the scene from the Temptations movie where Christian was singing his booty off was listed (swoon). So I pulled him up in IMDB and my crush ensued. LOL. I'll be over him by Thursday, but for now . . . . I crush . . .

Venture over to YouTube to hear him sing. It's not a "pretty" rendition, but it wasn't meant to be. However, you can tell that on any given night, you'd love to hear him serenade you.

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I'm in withdrawal . . . and it sucks

2010-05-01T18:16:00.000-04:00

Happy World Fitness Day! I planned to start my healthy living journey on May 1st (after I ate all the snacks I had stashed in my house). While reading this post on My Brown Baby blog, I learned that the day I selected to start was a worldwide day for Fitness. So here I am, excited and ready to go from jiggles to muscles . . . right?

Well, I guess I'm supposed to be excited, but not so much. I'm sitting here thinking about how tasty a Kit Kat bar would be right now and about how satisfying a (pack of ) Grandma brand vanilla creme sandwich cookies would be. I have something of a sweet tooth. I LOVE sweets, so this is going to be the hardest thing for me. I don't care about sodas, alcohol and juices (I don't drink either; only water, kicking that habit last month was actually easy). Fatty comfort foods aren't really a problem either, but candies and sweets . . . . sigh . . . So as a result, I'm going through withdrawal. I know that I can have sweets occasionally and it won't be an issue. I plan on getting some Dove dark chocolate bars, since they are apparently a "good" chocolate. I also plan to get a boatload of healthy snacking foods (like dried apricots and the little tangerines, which are like candy to me - yummy). I got my grocery list from Women's Health Magazine. So tomorrow, I'll be going shopping.

So when you start anything, you should want to have some kind of goal/expectation. Where do I want to end up?

Photo credit

LOL, not likely. It's not even really where I want to go. I would like to just be flat in the tummy area with toned armed arms (like Michelle Obama) with over all great health. More so like this . . . .

Photo credit

I know this is not an over night thing. I don't have a weight goal, I just know what I hope to look like. Hopefully I'm happy in the end. For right now, I'm going to make myself a snack of peanut butter on some raisin toast. Yum!

My Mii is chubby

2010-04-28T00:33:00.001-04:00

So I dusted off my Wii and put my Wii fit in the system. It was kind enough to remind me that I last visited in November of 2009. So I step on the Wii board and held my breath (cue elevator music for the 10 seconds that seems like 30 mins) . . . . "Ok" and I step off the board. I look at the screen and say . . . great, my Mii is chubby. Seriously, check her out

Sure it says normal, but my Mii is round about the waist - kinda like me - and that "Normal" line seems dangerously close to "Overweight." I guess I'm supposed to be happy since apparently in November I was heavier (is that my silver lining?)

So what motivated me to get in the scale? My best friend and I were reflecting on the noticeable tighter fit in our clothing (okay, the real story is she busted the seam in the dress she put on that morning and I almost split the zipper in my trousers on the same day; our clothes are literally trying to send us a message.

So, we decided to be diet buddies. We'll support each other and suggest food and fitness plans. Sounds like a great plan, right. So she said lets start today . . . . hmmm . . . I started thinking about the Rice Krispies Treats, Kit-Kat bars and cookies I had stashed in the house and suggested we start on the 1st of May . . . . I should be able to finish of my treats by then . . . right??? So for the next few entries, I will be focusing on eating better and exercise (blah). Hopefully I can stay the course. If anyone has great websites for easy to make healthy meals please send them my way. I eat out for just about every meal so this is going to be a shock to my lifestyle. So hopefully within the next six months when my Mii checks out her booty, her love handles won't get in the way.

Strength through Sorrow

2010-04-24T00:37:00.000-04:00

I have read on many occasions of parents-to-be who are excited and looking forward to their little one who is on the way suddenly be told that they had to say goodbye that day. I've known people who lost their babies and its always a sad thing to hear, but today it hit so close to home. My husband's best friend and his friend's girlfriend were expected a little one. Tonight his friend called and said that she was in the hospital in active labor. She was only 18 weeks pregnant. Usually the day you find out the gender of you child is filled with joy, giddy laughs and "I told you so's". Instead, he found out that he had a son when they handed him over wrapped in a blanket. He looked at his son in his arms. He expected to hold him in that manner in 22 weeks from now. He would have a son he could throw a football to, teach to drive a car and give advice. Instead, he held him 22 weeks early and his son would never experience those events with him. It broke my heart. Of course, I can't help, but ask the question, "Will this be my story too?" Will my husband and I be like his best friend and have to say goodbye without a chance to even say hello? It's amazing how you can love someone who isn't even here yet. I'll be going to the store to try to find a card to express my condolences. Although I know that it won't ease the pain, I want them to know that people care and are thinking about them.

30 is the new . . . . . . .

2010-04-04T01:06:00.000-04:00

Me.

I had a GREAT birthday. It started with my husband showering me with some nifty gifts. He gave me a Tiffany gift card that became two beautiful charms for my charm bracelet. He took me to lunch. He bought me an earpiece for my cell phone (much needed since my original iPhone I refuse to get rid of isn't working properly). He bought me two bottles of the new Halle Berry perfume. And then came the totally unexpected, icing on the cake of the wonderful birthday I've had, he took me to the opera. What!?!?!?! You heard me. We got dolled up and went out to see Porgy and Bess. It was great. Tomorrow will be another full day, this time with my friends, but this has been an AWESOME birthday. I guess 30 isn't so bad. . . . .

Baby it's cold outside!

2010-02-06T17:03:00.002-05:00

We are in the midst of a winter storm. It's been snowing since about noon yesterday (2/5/10). They (the weather "gurus") claimed it would stop by 5:00 pm today . . . . well, not so much. The snow is still coming down consistently. The snow plow in my neighborhood got stuck in the snow. The snow right in from my townhome ranged between 25 to 31 inches.

That large hump beyond the hill of snow next to the car is my neighbor's SUV.

Yes, you are seeing correctly, 25 inches, and it's just not stopping.

I am so over this weather and they have the nerve to predict that it will be snowing again on Wednesday. What a blower.
So when all looks down, at least there's shopping!! Things on my shopping list are:
New T&Co. Charms (the last one will take some time)

Just spent more than I should have yesterday on hair products online, but hey I was snowed in (My husband is looking at me type my blog right now, so I'll avoid mentioning the exact amount, LOL)

Life is good. We're happy watching the blacksplotation movies they play every black history month on TVOne. So Peace, Love and Soul . . . . . . .

Oh. Em. Gee. (OMG)

2010-01-16T01:12:00.002-05:00

The first time that I can recall hearing that acronym was in that Cingular commercial where the mother is upset about the phone bill and she approaches her daughter about it (you the know one famous for "IDK my BFF Jill"). I love when AT&T revived it and Grandma said she was texting her BFF Rose. Well, I'm not big on that acronym, but here is my "OMG" moment.

I met with my doctor today for an appointment. I was late for our 3o minute appointment (I was there on time at 2:30, but was in the car inhaling my lunch from Chick Fil A, I was so hungry), so I didn't get to ask all my questions. Luckily we have a phone consult scheduled for when my blood work results come back. We addressed several areas that I was concerned about, she told me to start taking vitamins and she ordered my blood work. So I walk down to the lab to get my blood drawn and . . . . . wait for it . . . . . OMG!!!!! They took 8 vials for blood. It was "only" eight because I had just had some blood work done for my annual physical with my primary care physician (cholesterol and glucose, yeeeessss, didn't have to do the fast again) or it would have been more. It seemed like the DRAINING of my vein would never end. All I could think was, well, I'm glad I ate or I might have fainted right here on this chair. After the vampire-ish ordeal was over, I was sent on my way. Oh drama.

38 days down . . . . . .

2009-11-11T21:41:00.000-05:00

. . . . infinity and beyond to go. I got married on 10/4/09 and it's been a wild and wonderful ride since we've been back. So upon our arrival back in town after a great honeymoon in Orlando, FL, we plunged into the world of DIY home improvement. We apparently couldn't settle for the simple, new furniture and some cute wall art . . . . We went all out. New floors. New wall color and all new furniture and decor. I'm in love with my . . . . . correction OUR bedroom. Upgrading from the carpet to laminate floors (no hardwoods with a 70 pound dog) was a LOT of work, but the end result is gorgeous. Upgrading from the full sized bed to the king sized bed was divine (although it was hilarious watching my 6'4" husband sleep with his feet hanging off the bed.) We still have so much work to do in here, but we're enjoying the transition.

Well, today was Veterans day and I had the day off work (hubby didn't). I went to work on making out master bath match the flyy of our bedroom. I bought a bathroom eterge/cabinet that has closed storage. Necessary because I finally . . . . *sigh* . . . . . . gave him room in the closet. LOL. I had a closet organizer (about 30" wide) in the closet that held my purfume, powders, lotions and other things. I took it out and put it in the the guest room so storage somewhere else in the room was a must. Hubby is enjoying his new found closet space and that's what matters (right?? LOL). We still need to paint the bathroom, put in some floating shelves and find some storage shelves that will fit in the 29" x 29" x 21" open space under our countertop, but it's looking great so far. I haven't forgotten about upgrading my style of dress, but upgrading my house has been so much fun.

Count down to show down

2009-09-30T02:16:00.000-04:00

Why does it seem that only at weird times I find myself here. . . . It's 2:15 am. . . . I finally finished packing for Florida. I'll be married in four days and 10 hours. Married . . . . gosh. When I was 16, I swore I'd be married by 22 (shoot, I thought that when when I was 21, LOL). When I passed 25, it seemed that marriage would never come. I can blame myself if that though. I dated, but never considered anyone I dated as a potential husband. So here, I am, 29 years young (hee, hee) and marrying a wonderful man. We drive each other crazy (gosh, he can be irritating as a hemorrhoid), but just yesterday I was lying in the bed thinking, our great days are so wonderful, the hiccups are so forgettable. Sometimes while we are arguing, we burst into laughing cause sometimes the arguments are so ridiculous and they are more about playing the other side of the coin than any true issues/feelings. We do have our down moments, but I think we work hard to make sure they are just that, moments. So tomorrow (well, actually today in like four hours) we'll be getting his rental car and I'll be jumping on my flight. For clarity, the kid doesn't fly so he's decided to drive to Florida . . . I have to complete so many errands so I can't drive down, but I believe I'm going to drive back up. So let the whirwind begin . . . . I can't wait for it to get here.

I've got a new attitude . . . . . .

2009-08-29T01:11:00.000-04:00

. . . . . about fashion!!!! I am enjoying polyvore soo much. Sitting there creating outfits out of items I already own or plan to buy has made my closet come alive!! I was two seconds from gutting the whole thing and starting afresh. . . . . Today I visited a blog, One Chic Momma, and she had an older post about transitioning your maxidress from summer to fall. So, of course, I head to polyvore and find a dress that is as similar to my maxidress as possible . . . . . the results . . . . .

Maxidress - summer to fall by FOOTSIE featuring Arden B

I love it . . . . . and will be looking for the items I don't have to pull off this look. Also . . . . . I also dabbled in another outfit based on the zebra shoulder bag and blue trench that I purchased from Wilson's Leather.

Untitled by FOOTSIE featuring Nine West

On the wedding front, tonight (since it is 1:17 am on Saturday morning) is our couples shower. My best friend and a friend of the family are throwing it for us. I hope it turns out the way they planned, but in any case, food and friends equals fun for me . . . . .

Part deux

2009-08-25T16:23:00.001-04:00

Yes . . . . I'm still sick . . . home all day . . . . can't do anything . . . and it still sucks donkey balls.

But being at home has given me the opportunity to browse the net , participate more in my message board and just relax (which is probably what my body needed after being away for a week for work). So, I was speaking with a girl on my message board about fashion and my lack thereof. Don't get me wrong . . . I got a boatload of hott shoes, great purses, and accessories out the whazoo . . . it's just that pesky issue about having to have clothes to go with them that plagues me. So, based on the tips she gave me, I created a new wardrobe on polyvore.com (which is the bizzness). I was even able to pull in some of the items in my closet (that previously looked so blah), into the outfits with the staples she suggested and they can have new life. I can't wait to leave the college intern behind (clearly I'm a late bloomer seeing that I got my Master's SEVEN years ago) and walk out the sexy, sophisticated executive.

View 'New Look' on Polyvore
As you can see, several items are repeated, which shows the versatility of the outfits. I also tried to give both winter and summer options within the same outfit. So, I'm bout to be a wife, might as well get my grown and sexy on now.

Having the cold sucks donkey balls

2009-08-24T14:08:00.000-04:00

Yes, that's exactly how I feel about the matter. I'm sick. What good is staying home from work if you don't feel well enough to do anything??? And let me tell you something, Nyquil is a narcotic . . . . seriously. I don't know if I got a bad batch that had, I don't know . . . . . cocaine in it, but it had me doing some weird stuff. Night before last, I literally lay down on the floor and went to sleep, but the kicker is, I told myself as I got down on the floor, "this is really weird, don't do this." I'm not sure how much time passed, but I eventually woke up and got into the bed. Needless to say, I didn't take anymore Nyquil. So I'm taking Dayquil . . . . less weird stuff, but weird stuff none the less.

Anywho, well, we're getting married in 41 days. *blink blink* Serious reality check. I need to get stuff done STAT!!! I still have to do the aisle runner, parasols, favor tags, programs and menu cards. I think that's it . . . . . oh wait, I have to buy the fiance' his wedding present. He wants me to tell him exactly what to buy for me . . . . :-( I like surprises. I plan on giving him a three fold gift. So far I bought the cutest little Duke baby booties (we're a house divided as I'm a UNC fan) as my promise to extend his lineage. The second will be my promise to keep it sexy (looking for the right lingerie) and the third is my promise to listen (I'll demonstrate this by purchasing the gift that he has mentioned wanting). For right now, we're just waiting for the RSVPs to roll in, but we both keep saying the same thing. We can't wait for it to get here already!!! We're ready to move into marriage.

The other item for which I had an October deadline is my law school application. I've made serious strides, but I want it to be just "so." It's taking quite a bit of time.

So it's almost 3 am and I'm awake

2009-08-15T02:47:00.000-04:00

I haven't been on this blog in about two months. I've been hustling and bustling . . . . Got my invitations out *doing my praise dance* and the RSVPs and rolling in. I am getting MARRIED in 7 weeks . . . the thought crossed my mind in the car this afternoon and I literally said Oh My Gosh, out loud. I'm excited and overwhelmed and excited. So why am I up at almost 3 am?? Am I finishing up some nifty cool wedding day item?? Maybe reworking my ceremony program? Browsing wedding articles for new ideas?? Nope . . . . I'm doing laundry . . . right . . . . not fun whatsoever . . . . My job is taking me out of town for a week and this is finally the time I've found to do my laundry . . . several loads so I am waiting for the end of the dryer cycle. . . . Usually the few times I've blogged, I've had something in particular to say, but not today . . . . I'm simply awake . . . . . at almost 3 am.

How do you know?

2009-06-08T00:41:00.001-04:00

How do you know that you've met the person that compliments you?

I was speaking with my co-worker last week about that famous line in the Jerry McGuire movie, "You Complete Me." That line first made it's way into the movie when a couple in the movie signed it to each other. Later on, we see Jerry use that line to win his love interest, Dorothy. As sweet as it sounded in the movie and it tugged on the hearts of the movie watcher, I was a little taken aback by that phrase. I told my co-worker, I hope that I never felt the need to be completed. I love the fact that although I came to my mate as a complete person, he compliments me. I am a sassy, rude, smart-mouthed, emotional, tender, angry, cocky crybaby. I am eclectic and eccentric. I am an overflowing handful of unpredictability. I am complete. My love is the ying to my yang, the up to my down, the right to my left. He balances me and I balance him. We challenge each other and have major blow ups, which help us to grow. I love him and that feels great. I dated many fellas, but he's different. He makes me happy. He makes me mature. He makes me smile. He has made such a difference in my life . . . . LOL, maybe he does complete me . . . . . . . . Well, maybe like Dorothy, he had be at hello . . . . and that's how I knew, he was the one for me.

So what now????

2009-05-31T23:01:00.000-04:00

I am bored. I have lots to do. After all, I'm getting married in four months. I have invitations to design, wedding programs to type, place card to print, seating to arrange. . . the list goes on and on. So how can I find the time to be bored. l guess I'm bored because I'm wishing there was something else to focus on. Don't get me wrong. I am excited to be getting married, starting a new life, (getting to do the nasty, LOL) and just getting my grown lady on. I kinda wish I could just fast forward past this part. Folks say "enjoy ur planning." Before I was engaged, I was sooo into planning and different ideas and this and that, but now, it just seems like the "thing" that's between my present and my future. Life is funny that way I guess. Oh well, back to planning. . .

Who am I . . . .

2009-05-13T23:07:00.000-04:00

Good question.

I'm a woman, a fiance', a Delta, a probation officer, an Aries, a Seventh-Day Adventist, a sister, a daughter, a friend, a tutor, a singer, a dancer . . . . but is that who I am? Or is that what I do?

Like anyone, I've been fashioned by the hand life has dealt to me. I've had trials, I've had triumphs. Many choices made, if given the chance to do over would definitely result in a change . . . places I've gone . . . . people I've "seen." Thinking back to some of the choices I've made makes me question myself, "Who was that girl?" Does she even know what she's doing? So as I've matured and grown, I reflect and ask myself, "Who am I?"

I am head-strong and I have an ATTITUDE. At the same time, I cry for commercials and my heart sinks when I see the missing pet signs. I'm mean . . . I'm sweet . . . I'm guarded . . . I'm open . . . I'm curious . . . . I'm disinterested . . . I love hard . . . I hardly love . . . I'm interesting . . . I'm boring. I'm organized confusion and ambiguously straightforward. I'm a work in progress . .
I. Am. Ms. Understood

What does Mother's Day mean . . . .

2009-05-12T09:03:00.000-04:00

I'm a big fan of wikipedia. Yes, sometimes the information is inaccurate because it is user created and can be user manipulated, but it is a great place to start your research. Mother's Day was this past Sunday. To be honest, I haven't celebrated Mother's Day in the past nine years and I actually forgot that it was approaching until I saw all the ads selling from flowers to chocolates to 50" televisions. Commercially, Mother's Day is big business. Some sources say that twice as many flowers are sold on Mother's Day than its close rival Valentine's Day. But what does any of it mean? The history of Mother's Day in the US is very different from its status today. It was an initiative pushed by Anna Jarvis. Anna's mother passed away in 1905 when Anna was about the age of 40. Two years later, in memory of her mother, she campaigned to have the holiday recognized as a day to honor mothers. She soon realized that once something becomes recognized, it becomes boxed and sold. She is quoted to have said, "A printed card means nothing except that you are too lazy to write to the woman who has done more for you than anyone in the world. And candy! You take a box to Mother—and then eat most of it yourself. A petty sentiment!"

Unlike Anna, I do enjoy cards. Sometimes someone else can put together what you feel into a beautiful card for a mere $5.99. But I do see her point. A five minute phone call to your momma and hearing the words "I love you" come from your lips beats a $5.99 card a hundred times over. Say it everyday that you can.

The last time I spoke to my mother was September 17, 1999. My father called me from her hospital room. She was on pain meds as the cancer was just too much for her to bear. The last thing I said to my mother was "I love you." She said something back. Under the influence of the pain meds, her speech was unclear, but I know what she said (sometimes all you need is a groan). The next day my aunt came to my school and told me my mom left. I was a 19-year-old college senior, already shaken by losing someone else very dear to me a mere few weeks earlier. We were celebrating my friend's birthday, now every year her day of birth means something very sad for me. So like I said, I haven't celebrated Mother's Day in nine years. Instead, I celebrate her everyday. That's what Mother's Day means . . . . .

What a way to start a blog . . .

Ms. Understood